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Tuesday 2 September 2008

My Dream and My Future

Be patient and read the whole thing if you really want to know about me. It's quite long, compared with my previous post. If you are not interested, you can just glance through or even skip this. But please don't ever ask me why I don't continue in sciences, I'm sick of answering that question. Thanks for those who read.
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My waiting is a long haul indeed. I've dreamt of admitting into a prestigious university since the first day me literate. Though this is not the one I yearn for, but I guess this will be a good one, for me to experience -- life.

While I was in primary school, I had told my fellow little playmates about my ambitious notion. Every child dreams. I was thinking of being comparable to the nobles, Einstein, Edison was my role model. I was the only student in my class who bought science magazine meant for upper primary students from the bookshop while I was in standard 2. Telling information from the magazines to my friends was my interest, though they couldn't understand me. In May of every year of my schooling times, we were asked to write 3 of our ambition. I always put "scientist" at the first column. I didn't think about which field of science I want to be in, as I do not have the complete image about science in my head. I just want to be a scientist that invents stuffs. I wrote things I want to invent in the future in papers, drew about rough design about how the things looks. I was so obsess in it. I told my parents about my ambition, and they supported me too. I was told that I must get excellent result for all these. I strived for these.

I'm not sure when the feeling comes -- I felt obliged to do law, without my parents persuading me. It was a strong feeling. Perhaps it is God's will, guiding me to a better path. And perhaps is due to conservative value that always flows in every Chinese's blood, including mine, that boy must be the inheritor. Otherwise, I'll be an unfilial child. My great aspiration to be a scientist had become obsolete since then.

Until I was in Secondary 4, I was exposed to much information about drug making -- I'm being introduced to chemistry at that level. My interest in science rekindled. I had decided to further my studies in ANU for pharmacy. I worked hard for it.

I knew that science and arts subjects aren't destined to be together, which means I'll have to make a final decision at the end.

So chose law, and I tried to develop my interest in other arts subject. I attended to many seminars about investing, banking, business, politics and other related ones. I wanted to take up an additional subject. I don't want to be tied up to a single subject in the future. Law won't take me too far, but business will.

During A-Levels, I was really into banking and investment stuffs. Maybe it was due to my attending to seminars. I listened to stories about successful fund managers in Wall Streets. I searched for information about emerging markets. Hence, I considered about taking Law and Finance double degree. It is a five years course. Due to some unforeseen circumstances, I was forced to drop that idea of taking a double degree. I have to obtain a qualification as fast as I can.

Now, it is only 2 weeks to my departure to The University of Manchester. I've to complete my obligation first before I can take up another subject. Few weeks ago, Sis Serin who had been working in my dad's firm for 20 years and looked me growing up asked me: "You've always told me you want to invent many things. But now why did you end up with law?" I remain silent. The rest of the conversation, I should keep mum about. She knows me quite well.

I'll give myself a long holiday, a real long one, after I've done my part. Perhaps it will last 5 years, 10 years or the rest of my life. I may not be able to take the holiday. Things are unpredictable. There may be drawbacks for me to do so. I'm going to have my own family in the future. If I'm only interested in pursuing my dreams, what will happen to them? I really have no idea about this. My conclusion: obligation is not parallel to what you dream for. The more you stand for obligation, the further you are away from your dream.

The only thing I'm very certain to tell you: "I will never be tied up in one field."

As politics is related to law as well, I hope that I will have a chance to take part in it, to uphold the juridical system, which has been dirtied by those people for years. I admit that I do still stammer when I talk, and my English level is not high either -- I got merely 6.5 for IELTS, which I feel ashamed of it. I'll try my best to overcome these.

I want to start my own enterprise before I'm 30.

I'm going to do a lot of things.

There are someone who ask me to go for my interest, what I like. But I answered: "Interest can be nurtured, and it is ever changing." History, which is the subject I hated the most when I was in secondary 1; I started to develop my interest in it after few years of studying it.

Now, I've fabricated a "dream" for myself. Law will be my very first step. My short term aim will be: getting a first class degree in law and get into The Honourable Society of Lincoln's Inn for my Bar Vocational Course.

I'll make it. It's just the matter of time.

3 comments:

Wanderer said...

too subjective.. haha..
ta ta to u soon.. hehe

Anonymous said...

Hey, it's good to receive a call from you last week ago. Your English has got tremendous improvement. I have to check some vocabulary in my tiny dictionary. What? I cannot even find them in my tiny dictionary...so sad...haha!

Anyway all the best to you. You should be in Manchester now if I am not mistaken. You know, I support Manchester United ever since I was a primary student. Lol!

ley said...

ley > teddy : duno la... maybe...

ley > sheng loong : my english is still so poor la... =) i'm not in Manchester yet... haha... i'll take photo at old trafford n post to flickr... so tat u can see me in front of ManU's stadium...